There’s always plenty happening in agriculture – much of it beyond our control.
From geopolitical issues to market prices to weather and right down to the dimwitted cow that decided to calve in the ditch or the mice that decided to take up residence in your tractor, happily feasting on the last of your harvest snacks.
I’ve mentioned it before, but I’m usually the one with my toe dipped in the “half-empty” glass. But sometimes all it takes is a little humor to remind me that life doesn’t always have to be so serious.
Sometimes, my husband and I keep in touch during the workday by sharing funny videos we’ve come across online. It’s usually a sign that he’s actually sat down for a lunch break or that I’m in need of a mental timeout. The videos are often playful jabs at each other – whether I’m teasing him about the infamous “man cold” (ladies, you know exactly what I mean) or he’s alluding to the fact that my reminders are actually “nagging” (but, hey, who else is going to remind him?). It’s all in good fun.
If you have a phone and some sort of online presence, I am sure you have seen the trend where you ask ChatGPT to roast someone or something. I’m always amazed at what that technology can do, so of course I had to try it for myself. My prompt? Idaho farmers and ranchers. This is what the chatbot came up with:
“Idaho farmers out here acting like their tractors are worth more than their houses – and let’s be real, they probably are. You’ll drop six figures on a brand-new John Deere with all the bells and whistles but still be out there cussing at it like it personally betrayed you the second something goes wrong. And let’s not forget, half of y’all are running vintage equipment that predates color television because 'they don’t make ’em like they used to.' Yeah, buddy, they also don’t break down twice a day like they used to.
"Ranchers, y’all have a lot in common with farmers, but let’s be honest – your entire personality is 50% beef prices and 50% complaining about city folk. And, I swear, every one of you has that one dog that 'just needs more training' but has been chasing cows the wrong direction for five years straight. Speaking of cattle, let’s not pretend that branding season isn’t just an excuse for an impromptu family reunion. Half the work gets done by teenagers who have no idea what they’re doing while the adults stand around drinking Coors and 'supervising.'
"Now, let’s talk about potato farmers. You guys act like Idaho is the only place that can grow potatoes – meanwhile, half the state couldn’t tell the difference between a russet and a Yukon Gold if their life depended on it. And don’t pretend you’re not secretly judging people who buy potatoes from anywhere else. You see an 'Oregon-grown' label and suddenly it’s personal.
"Dairy guys? Well, they’re out here running 24-hour milk factories where the cows get better health care than they do. Thousands of dollars go into cow comfort – misters, fans, back scratchers – but their idea of self-care is a gas station coffee and a half-eaten granola bar.
"Ah, Idaho. The state where you can brag about your potatoes while your internet still buffers like it’s the '90s. Your idea of 'urban sprawl' is a Walmart parking lot that’s almost full, and winter lasts six months while road construction lasts the other six. If Idaho didn’t have potatoes, huckleberries and elk hunting, would anyone even remember it exists?”
What do you think? How did the chatbot do? Hopefully something in there made you chuckle. I think we all need a good laugh sometimes and a reminder that life doesn’t always have to be so serious. Have a good month, everyone.
