Why does the stock water always fail on the day you leave on a trip? A day or two earlier and you have enough time to fix it. A day later and you will talk a hired hand through the fix.

The officer finally asked me, “Is there anything on this truck that is road legal?” I laughed, which was really awkward when I realized he wasn’t joking.

At least once during the holiday season you will hear "The Twelve Days of Christmas." Twelve days may not even be a season, but even in this holiday classic, they literally run out of good gifts after one day. 

Two years ago, my frustrated son sarcastically asked me, “Dad, could you make our steer feeding program any more complicated?”

“I accept your challenge,” is the reply that every parent should respond to a sarcastic child.

"Since I acquired a mortgage and an operating note, a two-dollar bet for a game of chance has lost its thrill."