One of our daughters recently graduated from college. She had three options for places to live after graduation, so a trip was planned to check out two of them. I was ecstatic when she invited me along. I didn’t even have to beg or hint!
We live in Montana, which was the location of job option number one. This option was familiar; she’s lived in Montana most of her life. Option two was in Texas, and option three was in Florida – neither of which was familiar, but certainly exciting possibilities.
We jetted to Florida first, getting there in time for a severe tropical storm. The annual average rainfall for our area of Montana (11 inches) fell in about 10 minutes. What a sight! Fortunately, it only lasted an evening, and we were able to walk around and see the sights the next day. We were in Miami, and life is different there compared to the ranch! My daughter planned the excursions, so we went places I wouldn’t have necessarily planned to go. We visited the design district downtown, with price tags as big as a tractor but for much smaller products like purses and shoes. There were bouncers at stores and even at the church we attended that weekend. However, I loved it. Not to live there, but I loved seeing how other people live. Experiencing new surroundings, different food and varied cultures brings a depth to our own individual experiences.
We experienced variety in Texas, too, but it wasn’t quite as different as Miami. You could still buy a pair of boots in town, although where we were was a tourist area with the type of boots that I couldn’t picture myself wearing. The music, food and shops were different from home. We walked nearly everywhere we went because we were staying in the city. It’s been a long time since I walked to a store! It’s a 15-minute drive from our house to our little town grocery store, but it’s over an hour to a city with larger stores.
Both places were wonderful for me. Spending time with our daughter was the greatest gift. Getting to see new places, especially from her viewpoint, was fascinating. Even though the cities were busy, the pace of life I witnessed was slow.
Over the years, we’ve been told countless times how lucky we are to live the life of ranching. I’m sure you have, too. And this is 100% true. We are lucky. Blessed. Fortunate.
But we also work hard.
I don’t say that to mean that we can take credit for what we have – we are grateful for the opportunities that God has given us. Every good and perfect gift comes from the Father. We are also aware that we are called to steward those gifts and work hard. We are driven to see progress and long-term positive impacts.
Over the years, we’ve learned practices for running a ranch with as much ease as possible, but there is the reality of certain seasons having long days because the season is short. Summers aren’t that long where we live, but the daylight hours are lengthy, so the days tend to stretch out with activity.
Whatever the reason, long days in ranching aren’t uncommon, and there is a real possibility of burnout. Burnout means you are tired of doing what you’ve been doing – physically, spiritually, emotionally or all the above.
Cowboys love their lives, so we don’t talk about burnout much. However, maybe we need to have a candid discussion because farming and ranching have a high percentage of mental illness and suicide. Sometimes, people feel trapped by the very lives they love. There isn’t an end to work and, depending on markets, prices may barely give you a paycheck for the long hours you’ve spent working.
By the time you read this, it’ll be August, and many people will have clocked nearly a summer’s worth of long hours. May I suggest a trip? Particularly one with a young adult? It doesn’t have to be across the country; you could go camping down the road. But take a break from your normal routine and get away. If you can get a little farther away from home, observe people around you. How do they live? What do you like? Not like? Taking note of what is important to the general population of a particular area encourages us to look at our own lives with a fresh lens.
Getting away is hard. The guilt of leaving the ranch is real. But the perspective we gain from getting away might just make up for it.
Seeing potential living places helped our daughter make her decision. While she loved the places she visited and suspects that maybe someday she could move to Texas, that day isn’t right now. She chose to stay in Montana. I didn’t influence her decision; she chose what is best for her. Could that change? Absolutely. Life changes can happen at any time for any of us. But if you’re feeling like life will never change and you’re stuck in the middle of fatigue – especially after a long summer – see if you can sneak away. You might find a fresh perspective and/or become more thankful for what you already have. Spending time with a young adult full of drive and possibility doesn’t hurt either.
And if you’re not able to get away, see if you can visit with someone outside your age demographic. What do they see on the horizon? What are they excited about? What frustrations do they experience? Whose podcasts do they listen to? I’d love to hear about any discoveries you make!
