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Home » Blogs » Progressive Dairy Tim the Dairy Farmer

Progressive Dairy Tim the Dairy Farmer
Progressive Dairy Tim the Dairy Farmer RSS FeedRSS

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Tim is a satirical comedian that bases his comedy on his upbringing on a dairy farm in Florida. 

The Manure Spreader: Valentine’s Day gifts

February 7, 2020
Tim Moffett
Well, Tim here with your yearly reminder that Valentine’s Day is just around the corner. If we’ve learned anything from the holidays, it’s that credit cards and yoga pants both have limits.
Read More

The Manure Spreader: Hearing crickets

January 17, 2020
Tim Moffett
There are two places that I cannot stand to hear crickets. One is outside my bedroom window when I’m trying to sleep. And second is in a room of 500 people that I just told a joke to.
Read More

The Manure Spreader: Fruitcake

December 12, 2019
Tim Moffett
The ultimate in longevity is the Christmas fruitcake. It’s a cake made during the holidays with fruits that make it heavier than the stove it is cooked in. —Erma Bombeck
Read More

The Manure Spreader: Bald eagle

November 27, 2019
Tim Moffett
I remember the first time I ever saw a man with a toupee! Our family was coming out of church on a windy Sunday.
Read More

The Manure Spreader: We’re here!

November 6, 2019
Tim Moffett
My grandpa always had a saying, “There is no house big enough for two families.” And that’s why he was the greatest single-wide trailer salesman ever.
Read More

The Manure Spreader: Trick or treat

October 18, 2019
Tim Moffett
Well, kids, it’s fall again. Festivals, costume parties and college football. I’ve talked about festivals in the past, and you know my view on college football. I root for whatever team is playing Ohio State.
Read More

The Manure Spreader: Get dirty

September 30, 2019
Tim Moffett
A recent scientific study revealed that growing up on a farm in a clinically unclean environment will actually boost your immune system. What does that mean for me?
Read More

The Manure Spreader: Talk louder!

September 11, 2019
Tim Moffett
How many times have we all heard the phrase, “You never listen to me!”? The majority of the time it’s said from spouse to spouse, from parents to kids, and from politicians to those of us that work for a living.
Read More

The Manure Spreader: In other news …

August 23, 2019
Tim Moffett
Well, it’s the nearly the end of summer. It’s been hot, a little stressful, and you can’t wait for your kids to return to the free babysitting we call school. I’d like to take y’all away from the farm for a couple of minutes and share a couple of stories recently in the news.
Read More

The Manure Spreader: Summer vacation

August 6, 2019
Tim Moffett
I’m not gonna lie. As a farm kid, I dreaded when school was out for the summer. Ahh, when school gets out for the summer to a farmer’s kid, what does it mean? Three times the work and no money. I failed algebra three times on purpose just so I could stay in summer school.
Read More
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